


Lingering pain

by Ulqueleh (Ulquii)



Series: Fore Bonding Series [3]
Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Alpha Lotor (Voltron), Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Established Relationship, Implied Sexual Content, Kinda, Kissing, Lotor Week 2020, Love Confessions, M/M, Non-Traditional Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Omega Matt Holt, Omega Verse, Past Relationship(s), Pillow Talk, Scars, Sex, There's A Tag For That, but like the end of it
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-25
Updated: 2020-08-25
Packaged: 2021-03-07 00:28:15
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,278
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26097892
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ulquii/pseuds/Ulqueleh
Summary: Lotor was loving —he found out the night they spent together at the office and confirmed with the kiss he finally pressed to his mouth. He was far from what he expected. So much more, too. And he couldn’t help but wonder time and time again if it was because of his broken bond.
Relationships: Matt Holt/Lotor
Series: Fore Bonding Series [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1893277
Comments: 8
Kudos: 30
Collections: Lotor Week 2020





	Lingering pain

He blinked away the blissful daze of orgasm when a hand cradled his face, thumb crossing over his prominent blush. He sighed at the soft caress, tilting his head into the warm palm, and opened his eyes to look at Lotor when he chuckled softly, still looming over him.

“Hey, sweetheart,” he murmured, and Matt scoffed weakly, rolling his eyes, “Was it good?”

“Fishing for praise, are you?” Matt teased mocking his elegant tone, pursuing his lips and leaving a kiss in the squishy part of his palm, near his wrist.

“I might,” Lotor sighed, pulling out slowly and making Matt gasp quietly the moment he was empty, “But if you are not going to be honest, I have to be the one to tell this was delightful.”

Matt snorted, watching him pull away from him just to get rid of the used condom and then lean over him again, now dropping half on his spent body and hide his face in the crook of his neck. He takes a slow breath and moves enough for a proper cuddle, his exhausted muscles protesting.

It’s always like this, he thinks, threading his finger through Lotor’s hair, pushing it away from his face and caressing his back. Lotor always becomes weirdly soft and affectionate after sex. Ever since that first time in his office, with Lotor rutting wildly against his leg until they both came in their pants like freaking teenagers. Lotor reached for him and hugged him close while still shaking from the aftershocks.

They had stayed like that, wrapped in each other’s limbs until the sky started to light up and the stars disappeared below the heat of the morning sun. They went to it again soon enough, though, because one orgasm was not enough to calm down a rut despite how hard it might’ve been —pretty hard, if Matt is being smug about it.

At first, Matt thought it was just because it had been a long time since he was with someone, and, honestly, he was still too cotton-headed to think properly about it.

Then, after Lotor had collected himself enough to stand up and head home, Matt had been musing over that cuddly side of Lotor, so very soft and sweet and _needy_ that Matt would’ve never imagined.

‘It must be because of his broken bond,’ he had thought suddenly, pausing mid bite on his dinner-slash-breakfast, ‘It must be because he needs an omega to fill that empty space his previous partner left.’

He lost appetite and headed to bed even when her sister complained about it. He stopped before closing his bedroom door, though, asking himself if it was a good idea to ask her about it since it’s her who has all the existent knowledge about secondary genders and bonding. But decided against it, seeing her wrinkle her nose, probably catching some of Lotor’s scent still lingering on his skin. ‘It would just raise more questions,’ he convinced himself, ‘and it’s better if she doesn’t know about Lotor and your brief relationship with him.’

It was everything but brief, though. Where Matt believed he would come to work on Monday and Lotor would take distance and keep himself from flirting like he would every time they were alone, he was shocked when he found Lotor waiting for him in his lab room, checking out the project —without touching, which Matt appreciated— he had been working on Friday night before _them_ happened.

“I like you,” Lotor had said after a very long and uncomfortable silence that followed Matt’s questioning. He hated how honest he sounded, “Very much so. And I wish you could give me an opportunity to make this right.”

Matt almost asked again what _this_ was, but the hard beating of his heart, eager at Lotor’s confession and petition, just reminded him of Lotor’s reverent kisses, of his careful caresses, of his tender touch. Maybe his attraction wasn’t just one-sided. And yeah, Lotor could’ve said he liked him, but that doesn’t mean he was as invested on him as Matt was on Lotor.

“Okay,” he conceded, and raised his eyebrows when Lotor sighed in relief, his face blushing softly, “Oh, wow. You’re blushing.”

Lotor had thrown an annoyed glance at him, but his smile didn’t move from his lips.

“I am more troubled that you are not,” he had whispered, taking a step to him and making Matt tilt his chin up to look at him, a shiver going down his spine, “Shall I do something about it?”

Lotor was loving —he found out the night they spent together at the office and confirmed with the kiss he finally pressed to his mouth. He was far from what he expected. So much more, too. And he couldn’t help but wonder time and time again if it was because of his broken bond.

‘A person isn’t just his broken bond,’ he had to remind himself, recalling briefly of Shiro before and after his bond was broken, ‘They are so much more than just that.’ But the broken bond could evidently make changes in one’s personality. In one’s way of acting and reacting. Of perceiving.

He looked down to Lotor’s neck, turned just right for him to see one of the half-moons scarred on his nape. It wasn’t the first time he had seen them, of course, but it always bring up the same questions without answer; Who were they? How did they bond? How is Matt supposed to fill a gap he doesn’t know what shape it has? Is he supposed to fill it, though? Should he _try_ or should he just accept that he can’t ever be the one Lotor lost?

“Thinking out loud, are we?”

Matt’s gaze shoots up to Lotor’s, shockingly warm and soft. He had caught Matt staring at his bond mark, and now that Matt notices, his hand is halfway reaching for it to touch.

“I-” he tries, pulling away, but Lotor holds his hand, kissing his wrist gland and making him take a sharp breath from sensitivity.

“You can touch,” he says against his skin, leaving another kiss just below before looking up at him, “You can ask, too, if you want to know.”

Matt swallows, hand still in the air after Lotor lets it go, and doesn’t know if he should.

“I…” he starts and shakes his head, “You don’t have to-”

“I know,” Lotor murmurs, smile plucking a corner of his mouth, “But I want to.”

Matt hesitates for a bit, taking in the carefully controlled dark on Lotor’s eyes. Not as if he’s about to do something wrong that might hurt him, but as if he had done something that hurt someone as important as Matt is to him right now and deeply regrets it.

And Matt has his curiosity, as unrestful as ever, but he doesn’t want to revive Lotor’s pain just because of it.

“No, it’s fine,” he assures, still reaching for Lotor’s nape and thumbing the scar. He reveals in the way Lotor shivers.

“You don’t want to know?”

Matt stares at his eyes, finding way more scars hidden in his soul, the one on his skin being just a little part of his past. Matt isn’t one to judge by scars, either way.

“I do,” Matt confesses, Lotor’s perfectly manicured eyebrow arching up in question, “But when you’re ready to tell me. Not just because I asked you to.”

Something eases on his gaze, something that tells Matt he’s doing the right choice, and Lotor leans up to leave a sweet little peck on his lips.

“Thank you, love,” Lotor murmurs against his mouth, and Matt sighs, kissing him back.

**Author's Note:**

> This story is part of the [LLF Comment Project](https://longlivefeedback.tumblr.com/llfcommentproject) (including the [LLF Comment Builder](https://longlivefeedback.tumblr.com/commentbuilder)), which was created to improve communication between readers and authors. This author invites and appreciates responses, including:
> 
>   * Short comments
>   * Long comments
>   * Questions
>   * Constructive criticism
>   * “<3” as extra kudos
>   * Reader-reader interaction
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